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Current mood:	meditative
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Entry tags:	defragging brainbits

identity?

identity as something inside that is expressed outer? or something outside that shapes the inside? useful distinction? (return to this later)

attitudes and stances and ideas
influence how we deal with situations
influence our experiences of things - our experiences of our experiences even
meta-experiences?

rigidly defined identities exist, just as rigidly defined everythings-else.

why do ppl want to rigidly define identity thru markers? sanity? stability?
hmmm.
pedantic.

ok, it's not really being in touch with reality, per se, cos they're more really holding on to a specific view, a discourse, extremely strongly. They may array themselves with an armory of relevant facts and common sense and personal experience..

hmm.

*observe though, your own slant here - you are already interpreting them in your own schema's frameworks.*

lol. in my observations though, that works out so far quite well la to explain stuff.

spectrum of reality

facts - generalized statements of observation about phenomena which can be objectively tested to some degree...

THIS IS A PRATA

feelings - subjective experiences of phenomena

THIS PRATA IS GREAT

or

THIS PRATA SUCKS

then mmmm... social reality gets into the picture.

WAIT.

social science problem zomg the oldest engineering fake out solution

if the hypothesis you have created does not suit the phenomena you are studying, you can change either the hypothesis, or the phenomena!

LOL. ok. frigging cheaterbugs.

By streamlining social reality into a certain form - through the use of various engines - you can manipulate ppl's actions and perceptions....

Then by removing certain scopes of action from the realms of imaginable and actualized possibility, and by transforming how people think and feel with control over media and knowledge... you can make them into you.

Cos it's not bout who you are, for most ppl?

it's bout what you do?

then when what you do (no-sync) with your self-image, you break down, go bwuhhhhhhggdgdg?

then you do what you are doing/ have done/ have been made to do, and your self-image kinda cracks and you rearrange the broken mirror shards into liquid glass and paint over the holes in the soul and pretend they not there at all?

Then then then

then hor it's like one day quarter life crisis, WHY AM I DOING THIS

I NEVER LIKED THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE

WHO AM I

ZOMG

OH NOES.

(then ya la, ok, aunties, mom, you will send your kids to tuition and piano and say "that is the real world.")
(but i got you to admit at lunch yesterday that was how *you* thought!)
(and then you admitted it's cos you are worried - which is yay, it's a human thing to feel emotion. don't argue from authority over metaphysics ok! as long as you human, not robot. elemental also can. thanks for being fleshy organic.)

THEN HOR. ppl will call you irresponsible, say you never think of big picture.

that discourse privileges certain masculine ideas of man over nature, of technocratic power, of ascetic discipline without the introspection and humility.

It's like become a monk for pride's sake, look at how i flagellate myself, and get toughened, and endure, without walking the path of lily or lotus.

lol, silly male pride.

ok, then. come back to topic la, nabuay, you got thesis to write.

this is dancing around the main issue.
but you not approaching it fully yet!

bakhtin, butler, turner, herzfield, appadurai, abu-lughod, husserl, scheler, geertz, tolkien, goffman, cs lewis, foucault

autoethnography stuff
symbolic anthro stuff
philosophical anthro stuff

arghified! then there's the fieldwork to make sense of too.

it'll all be all right. City, speak to me. I hear you.